Renew Your Mind in 5 Essential Steps

Why do we need to renew our minds?

Renewing your mind is a process you may repeat several times throughout the course of your life. As you grow and mature, or go through life experiences, your mindset shifts. It is up to us to renew our minds as we grow through what we go through.

There are several instances that come to mind when I think of the reasons we should renew our minds…

The transition from young adulthood to being a grown woman is a major turning point that requires us to renew our minds as we enter careers, marriages, parenthood, and new responsibilities.

Maybe you’ve suffered a loss of some sort; a close loved one, long-time friendship, or intimate relationship that caused your mind to go to a dark and lonely place.

Perhaps you’re holding on to something that happened to you in your childhood, and it’s preventing you from achieving true freedom and happiness. (we’ll talk more about this during “heart week”)

Sometimes you just reach a point in your life when your routine has become so predictable and unexciting that your mind is in limbo.

You end up trapped somewhere between complacency and a desire for something more.

I can identify with pretty much all of these situations, and I’m here to tell you that there is hope, no matter how bad your story is, or how “messed up” you think you are on the inside.

How do you renew your mind?

I can think of two turning-points in my life that I had to renew my mind.

The first time was in college. I never felt like I fit in completely. I remember going to parties and trying to put up a front like I was enjoying myself. I made choices that I normally wouldn’t just to participate in the “college experience”.

It wasn’t until I got tired of the constant internal battle, that I decided to make a change. God was calling me to be set apart, and that was something I would no longer run from, nor be ashamed of.

I had always been a pretty spiritual person, but this change required more than simply proclaiming Christianity, reading my bible occasionally, and attending church.

My sophomore year of college, I isolated myself from the outside world, and began to do some of the hardest work of my life.

These 5 steps helped me renew my mind and start living a more purpose-driven life.

1. Separate yourself from negative relationships and habits

One of the first steps in renewing your mind, is separating yourself from people, habits, or anything else preventing you from living your best life.

Isolation can be both helpful and harmful. I took some time away from friends, TV, and social gatherings to really focus on getting my mind right. (social media wasn’t a big thing then, but it would certainly be on my list today)

When you hang on to people and things that aren’t conducive to the life you are trying to achieve, your progress will be continuously delayed.

I learned this the hard way after years of doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results…the definition of insanity.

Don’t worry that you won’t have any friends left by the time this is all said and done. Not all separations are permanent, but you must strengthen your mind before you can consider maintaining friendships from the circles you used to run in.

You will know in your heart who/ what needs to be cut off for good, and it takes A LOT of prayer and will power to stick to it.

Isolating yourself from people is one thing, ridding yourself of behaviors that have become habitual is another. Whatever those things are that you know are not elevating your life on the path to becoming your best self need to go.

Once you remove the distractions and begin the process of breaking bad habits, the hardest part is done!

2. Write down quotes and scriptures to meditate on

I spent a lot of time reading and praying, so it was only natural for me to find scriptures to meditate on throughout the day.

I searched the bible for scriptures about renewing your mind, wrote them down, and posted them all over the house.

It didn’t take long for me to commit them to memory as I mediated on them over and over again, especially when I felt tempted to fall back into old habits.

Here are a few of my favorites, but I encourage you to find what speaks to you…

“Do not be conformed to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – His good, pleasing, and perfect will.” Romans 12:2

“Greater is He that is within me, than he that is within the world.” 1 John 4:4

“But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” Galatians 5:22

3. Find positive, messages, podcasts, sermons, etc.

The most recent time in my life that I’ve had to renew my mind was after having children and transitioning from corporate America to stay-at-home mommy.

I have always been very career driven, so this was a huge change for me, and I didn’t expect the emotions that came along with it.

It is such a blessing to be able to stay home with my girls, but after the second year or so, I started feeling unproductive.

I felt like I should be contributing more to my household, and to society.

In a way, it seemed like my life & dreams were on hold, while everyone around me flourished.

Maybe you identify more with being stuck in a pattern of being unfulfilled either in your career, dating life, or life in general.

Once I really evaluated my situation, I realized that I was exactly where I was supposed to be in that season of my life. Mothering. The most important job in the world, and there I was upset that I couldn’t help someone else with my gift.

Through prayer and meditation on God’s word, listening to motivational messages, and reading some life-changing books, I could feel my mind begin to renew and take charge again.

YouTube is one of my go-to resources for sermons, TED talks, etc. I fell in love with Sarah Jakes Roberts, a variety of TED talks, and spent a lot of time listening to worship music.

Whatever uplifts you, engage in that everyday as much as you possibly can!

Podcasts, audio books, or daily devotions may be more your speed. Just find what works for you and stick with it! 🙂

Our paths will all look a little different, but the end goal is the same. Drown out the negative, unproductive thoughts that are keeping you from moving forward with all the positive vibes you can muster.

*Subscribers have access to my mini worship playlist. Subscribe now to get yours!

4. Train your mind to find the bright side to every situation

It’s funny how our internal thoughts contradict what actually comes out of our mouths sometimes.

If your thoughts were spoken out loud would you be proud, or would you want to duck your head and hide?

At one point in my life, my thoughts were not something I could be proud of. I knew this wasn’t pleasing to God, and certainly not helping me to become the woman I was called to be.

I knew I had to re-train my thoughts in order to renew my mind, so I decided to find something positive about everyone I saw or spoke with.

When I was in college, I would sit in my cubicle at work and do this exercise as I waited for my next call.

Every person I laid I eyes on, I found a positive attribute about them. Sometimes physical, other times internal.

Instead of thinking “that hair color doesn’t really fit her”, I would find her best feature and admire that instead.

My only regret is not actually sharing what I was thinking. I had to learn to give compliments as well as receive them, but that’s another story for a different day.

I started to look at the world and the people in it the way I imagined God would. He created each of us in His image, so how could He see anything other than beauty?

The same thing applies when we have bad days or unfavorable circumstances arise in our lives.

If we train our minds to find the bright side, (because there is ALWAYS a bright side) we can rebound so much quicker.

When we dwell on the bad instead of focusing on the good things that we can control, we rid ourselves of our power.

5. Surround yourself with like-minded people

I can’t take credit for getting to a victorious head-space on my own. It took (and still takes) the encouragement and prayers of others in my circle to help me get and stay on track.

In college and beyond, my mentor has been a voice of wisdom and support to strengthen me when she didn’t even know I needed it. (Love you Mrs. Gaines)

My best friend has given me so much encouragement during my darkest days when I felt lost and alone. She gave me books that helped to elevate my mindset at just the right times, and prayed me through some difficult seasons. (Thanks Monica)

Most importantly, my mom and sister have been a constant pillar of support and love throughout my life. I can call them anytime I need to pray or talk through a situation, and they will give me a positive word of encouragement. (Love y’all)

There are so many others that I could mention who have all been a positive force in my life in one way or another. You all know who you are!

The point is, you can’t do it alone. As I mentioned before, isolation can be both helpful and harmful.

Once you have spent some time in steps 1 & 2, be sure to re-connect or establish positive relationships with people who will elevate you and hold you accountable.

Your circle should not only be a reflection of who you are, but where you’re going.

You’ve got this lady!

Are you ready to do the work? I hope you’re motivated and equipped to change your life from the inside out!  I’m here if you have any questions or feedback on your journey.

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